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The Archives of October, 2004

October 1st, 2004
VERBATIM: PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH
VERBATIM: PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH

Smirk, blink, wince. Smirk, blink, wince. Smirk, blink, wince. How dare he criticize the commander-in-chief. He looks orange, like a Mexican.

October 7th, 2004
Belinda's Commons Diary
Belinda's Commons Diary

So, here I am - the Member of Parliament in the House of Commons for...well...somewhere north of Toronto. Now that I've finally arrived, I feel totally honoured to be here. But it hasn't been all easy.

October 8th, 2004
A Visit to Liz's Used Discount Submarines
A Visit to Liz's Used Discount Submarines"We have a tremendous selection of value priced subs...this one is a '79, low mileage, lady driven..."
October 16th, 2004
The Dave McGraw Interview: NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman
The Dave McGraw Interview: NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman

With the great unwashed desperately concerned about the absence of NHL hockey here in our country this fall, he went straight to the source for some answers. He flew to New York City earlier this week for an exclusive, one-on-one interview with Gary Bettman, Commissioner of the National Hockey League, to find out for Canadians when the dispute that has sidelined the "Coolest Game on Ice" might come to an end.

October 17th, 2004
The Hammer Cartoon - Gas Prices
The Hammer Cartoon - Gas Prices

Gas prices getting you down?

October 18th, 2004
Slam Poet Promoted to Head Greeter at Walmart
Slam Poet Promoted to Head Greeter at Walmart

Jeremy Illiac, one of the premier slam poets in the greater Cornwall area, has been promoted to head greeter at the Walmart store where he has worked for seven years.

"Well I'm a happy wage slave, just working for the man, going to save up all my money, go to Florida, get a tan..."

October 25th, 2004
Harper Demonstrates Flemish Fluency
Harper Demonstrates Flemish Fluency

Noted Belgiophile and leader of the opposition Stephen Harper answered reporter's questions in Flemish during a scrum earlier today.

October 27th, 2004
Kerry Once Again Reminds Voters He's Not Bush
Kerry Once Again Reminds Voters He's Not Bush

"Just another friendly reminder, I am not George W. Bush."

October 29th, 2004
God Formally Endorses Bush
God Formally Endorses Bush

Just days before Americans go to the polls, the U.S. presidential election received a major shake-up today when God - the big guy in the sky - officially endorsed George W. Bush for president.

October 31st, 2004
Cheney Goes as Himself for Halloween
Cheney Goes as Himself for Halloween

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