The TRUTH About the Easter Bunny: An Ottawa Sun Exclusive

Every year around this time, a supposedly squeaky-clean little bunny skips from house to house, distributing candy to Christians and people who were forced to go to church when they were a kid. How cute, right? Well, you wouldn't think it was so 'cute' if you knew what this sex-addicted, vodka-guzzling, lecherous little 41-year-old 'bunny' really was all about. Our crack research staff here at the Sun has uncovered some disturbing facts about the Easter Bunny that every irate, reactionary Canadian should know.